Forgetting What It Means to Be Normal

I can feel the slow changes of medical school in me.

Some days I forget what my life was before this journey began.

As a premed, I thought I would be different, I would be immune to the challenges and difficulties.

I can start to see the long road ahead, the debt, dangers, disease, death and despair.

Today, I saw some kids get grossed out by some images of the body’s innards. I didn’t give it a second thought.

Rare and complicated diseases are becoming interesting subjects instead of the sad human conditions they are.

It feels like I speak a new language full of medical jargon and acronyms.

My number of non-medical friends I keep in touch with is gradually shrinking.

I’m eating, sleeping, breathing medicine.

I’m not sure if this is the type of person I want to become.

I will surely come out a different person.

I want to be a good doctor, but do I want to become a medaholic?

2 Responses to Forgetting What It Means to Be Normal

  1. TheMemoirist says:

    I know what you mean…

    I remember during the week of orientation before school began. There was a Professor of Psychiatry who came to talk to us–she told us that our parents, siblings, spouses, and friends would “grive for the loss of their loved ones” because medical school has such a changing effect on people. I think she was being overly-dramatic for effect, but the point she made has stuck with me.

    That scared the crap out of me, and ever since then I’ve been very mindful of subtle changes in my personality. I don’t know if it can be avoided, but I hope to at least minimize the effects.

  2. Bobo says:

    Nooo! Say it ain’t so…

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